What's YOUR Uncertainty Style?

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Quiz Questions

1.
When I feel scared, I tend to:
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- A.
  Do all I can to get out of the situation as fast as I can
- B.
  Work harder, do more, scramble to find the right thing
- C.
  Blame others or myself
- D.
  Align with the most powerful, supportive person in the situation
- E.
  Pause, notice what is happening, and look to see what is revealing itself
2.
When I am called out on something, I often:
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- A.
  Find a way to frame it as a good choice, even though it wasn't
- B.
  Apologize, even if I don't see what the problem is
- C.
  Assign the problem to someone else
- D.
  Explain and explain, backing it up with data
- E.
  Insist I was right and find a way to feel bigger
- F.
  Act contrite, and find clever ways to get what I want
- G.
  Get very curious. See if I can understand what the other person is seeing
- H.
  Get scared, try to find a way out
3.
When I face confrontation or conflict, I frequently:
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- A.
  Look like I'm still listening, but I'm somewhere else
- B.
  Find an excuse and leave
- C.
  Argue
- D.
  Work hard to smooth things over and make the conflict go away
- E.
  Listen intently to learn other perspectives
- F.
  Engage and get very curious
4.
When I need to make a difficult decision, I tend to:
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- A.
  Find ways to put off the decision.
- B.
  Become very directive
- C.
  Find out what others think and find a way to align with those who I perceive to be most powerful
- D.
  Stress over finding the "right decision"
- E.
  Discuss facts and knowledge related to the issue at hand that don't necessarily move me closer to a decision
- F.
  Acknowledge the complexity and pull in those that can help me see a more full picture, if needed
- G.
  Gather information and sit with the situation until the direction is clear; with awareness and compassion for all that is/who are impacted by the decision
5.
Would you rather:
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- A.
  Be in charge
- B.
  Hold a supporting role to someone more powerful
- C.
  Be the one who radiates brilliance and knowledge
- D.
  Work in the background, behind the scenes
- E.
  Succeed
- F.
  Make a difference, benefitting the whole
- G.
  Navigate with simplicity, compassion and patience
6.
When encountering uncertainty, what is your primary response?
- A.
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  Anger. Aggression. Irritation. Blame.
- B.
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  Withdrawal. Whether physically walking out of the room or becoming distant.
- C.
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  Speechless. Frozen. Stopped in your tracks.
- D.
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  Entitled. A demand to be seen as worthy or special. Or Submissive. Efforting to please others.
- E.
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  Curiosity. Patience. Listening
- F.
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  Override and muscle your way through
7.
What do you fear most?
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- A.
  That I won't learn and master enough
- B.
  That I lack a unique or significant identity
- C.
  Being unaccomplished or worthless
- D.
  Being unloved or unwanted
- E.
  Not getting what I want
- F.
  Feeling alone with no support or guidance
- G.
  Being stuck in pain or sadness
- H.
  Being controlled by others
- I.
  Feeling disconnected and out of sync with the world around you
- J.
  Being unable to stand up to corruptness
- K.
  That someone else will look like they know more than I do
- L.
  Being criticized
- M.
  Not recognizing that I'm scared
- N.
  When I notice fear, I look to see if I can see through the fear to what's behind it. It's not so much what I fear the most, but how I navigate fear when it arises.
8.
When a situation is both important and unclear, I tend to:
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- A.
  Scramble to find the right response
- B.
  Start making decisions. Any decision is better than no decision
- C.
  Seek to reassure others
- D.
  "Channel" those I admire (What would _ do?)
- E.
  Become overly responsible - it sometimes feels like I caused the situation
- F.
  I tend to go off by myself and think
- G.
  I start seeing more faults in others and get scared
- H.
  I find a way to reframe the situation and look for someone else to address the issue
- I.
  I refuse to see the seriousness or minimize the issue
- J.
  Engage in casual conversations or go for a walk to decompress, avoiding the issue
- K.
  Find a way to back out of the situation
- L.
  Get curious, what is it that i am not seeing?

Quiz Outcomes

1.
The Director
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You scored as "The Director" When you face uncertainty, your default reaction is to find a way to feel in control. You are often compelled to take charge in order to feel safe. It can look to others like only you know what is right in a given situation. Remember, these styles are created to keep us feeling safe. We default into styles when we feel threatened - as a way to find more safety. It's helpful to get to know your styles, so you can begin to recognize when they appear. Want to learn more? Start to observe yourself in challenging or pressured situations - what do you do? How do you feel? What do your notice? You can also ask your friends and co-workers what they notice, if you'd like. Often it's much easier to see others clearly than it is ourselves. You may want to pay attention when you feel stressed and see how you may be more controlling or directive than you realize. As you notice more, you may find that you soften a bit. If this seems to be a strong reaction in you, and one that impacts your work or personal life, you may want to seek some outside support.
2.
The Superior One
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You scored as The Superior One VUCA -volatility, uncertainty, complexity and ambiguity is often threatening! One way you keep yourself feeling safe is by puffing yourself up to appear better than others. You learned this early on, and now it may well feel so "normal" to you, that you don't even recognize this is happening. When you are threatened, you find ways to position yourself above other people. You gain power by making others feel small. Remember, we learned to use these styles to keep ourselves safe. Getting to know your styles - the different ways you react when you feel threatened - helps you to begin your journey to a more joy filled and creative life. A few things you can do are: - begin to notice what happens when you feel stressed or overwhelmed. What do you do? How do you do it? - ask a friend or colleague (or your partner) what they notice happening when you appear stressed or overwhelmed. - Begin to get to know your styles. - Be gentle with yourself and others. And remember, we need all the bandwidth we can get to deal with an uncertain or VUCA environment, so if you find yourself there a lot, it's even more important to build the capacities you need so you can excel and flourish even when it's VUCA out there!
3.
The Politico
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You scored as the Politico When you are faced with uncertainty, you schmooze in order to feel safe. You present as shiny and polished, and often what is happening inside you is very different than what you show those on the outside. You find safety in presenting a polished exterior and often veil what is true for you. Underneath all of this, you will do whatever it takes to get what you want. This can serve you in some ways, and in others hinder you more than you can see. In a VUCA environment (Volatility, Uncertainty, Complexity and Ambiguity), we need as much of our pre-frontal cortex online as possible in order to navigate. If we're reacting, by definition, we've lost varying degrees of access to our pre-frontal cortex. VUCA requires us to be fully online in order to navigate the challenges we face. Remember, these styles are ways we learned to feel safe - ways we learned that worked for us in challenging situations. By getting to know our styles - the ways we show up when we face uncertainty - we can begin to feel more relaxed and at home with ourselves and others. Really. And we have more capacity to navigate what's in front of us. You may want to pay closer attention to how far you will go to get what you want. If you discover that others are being hurt, belittled or otherwise less than respected, you may want to take a look at what is going on for you with outside support. Remember, this is a safety strategy. It's not required for life - only until your overall system realizes it no longer serves.
4.
The Teflon One
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You scored as the Teflon One One of the ways you make yourself feel safe when things are uncertain is by not being responsible. And your flavor of not being responsible has to do with not allowing anything to stick to you. You tell yourself "It's not my fault. It's someone else's problem." Not sure this is your style? Ask your co-workers or spouse. Often others see these things in us so much more clearly than we can... we're like a fish - we're the last to know we're in water. Remember, we learn these styles in order to find safety. They are well practiced. We've been doing them a long time. And we ALL have styles. Different people react in a variety of ways in different situations. If you are curious, you can pay attention to what happens for you when you feel stressed. Watch what it is that you do. See what you learn.
5.
The Anticipator
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You scored as The Anticipator When you face uncertainty, you plan and re-plan to avoid problems. Your primary safety strategy is avoiding problems - at all costs. You allocate a lot of bandwidth to envisioning scenarios that might happen in the future and finding ways to assure that things will be ok. It is hard for you to tolerate discomfort when things go badly, so you would rather find ways to assure that they won't. Remember, we learned to react to feeling threatened in the ways we do for good reason - it worked at one time in our lives. When we are children, life is simpler. In this VUCA world we live in (volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous) it's a whole lot harder to ensure that we can avoid problems. Many would say impossible. If you find yourself exhausted by all of your myriad efforts to assure that you avoid problems, and still find yourself in hot water, you may want to learn more.
6.
The Brilliant Mind
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You scored as exhibiting The Brilliant Mind When people with this style feel uncertain, they protect themselves by showing they are the smartest person in the room. If this is your style, you may find yourself letting everyone know that you already know - you display vast intellect and knowledge. When this no longer works, you leave. Isolating yourself in order to feel safe. Remember, we all have Styles - most of us have more than one, depending on the situation. This style has a great payoff. This strategy often supports people in becoming scholars of all sorts. The one who reads everything - who is like a sponge for information. It's great, until we use this strategy to make ourselves feel better at the cost of someone else. That can lead to "oops!" This uncertain world is causing many of us to see more and more clearly how we respond. Often it's not pretty. Yet, once we begin to see our styles, and get to know our reactions, we can begin to bring more of ourselves online - and we need all the bandwidth we can get to navigate in a VUCA environment (volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous).
7.
The Winner
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Your score reflects that your Style is The Winner You find safety in being seen as successful, and you will present yourself as successful as long as you possibly can. "Don't let them see you sweat" may well be one of your mantras, even if you don't realize it! You will work very, very hard before giving in to any form of failure. Failure is really not an option for you, especially when you are feeling threatened. In our current environment, VUCA, or volatility, uncertainty, complexity and ambiguity, arises frequently. And this is a perfect storm setup for us to get to see our own and other's uncertainty styles. Just like everyone else, you may well have multiple Styles, depending on the situation. It can be helpful for you to get to know your Styles of finding safety, and start to see that all of your hard work may well fool others some of the time. If you are finding yourself exhausted and depleted it may be time to take a deeper look.
8.
The Right One
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Your responses reflect that your Style, when facing uncertainty, is The Right One You find safety in feeling that you are right. This sense of self righteousness has it's roots in a need to firmly ground yourself in having done the right thing. You want others to see you as having done the right thing, and that you are doing good. You may find yourself narrowing your focus to an area that you can control - an area where you can make sure that you are right. When you feel threatened, you find a way to be right - even if you are not! Remember, we develop these strategies - these styles - in order to find a way to feel safe. As children, we don't have a lot of options regarding control of the outer environment. Sometimes, we find a way to control it from the inside. Which may mean creating a version of reality that works for us. And, perhaps, one that is not totally aligned with the reality of those around us. It's subtle, and it's there. If you are cringing in recognition, you may want to learn more. We all have Styles we've developed in order to feel safe. You are not alone in any way. And, sometimes in our adult lives - at work and at home - we find more joy and delight when we can ease up a little.
9.
The Avoider
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You have scored as The Avoider You avoid anything disconcerting, in order to feel safe. And you have your own style of doing this. You refuse to worry. Your mantras may well be "It's all good" or "No worries, be happy." There may be all sorts of conflict going on around you. You have an amazing capacity to numb and not notice. This works well, as long as you live in a vacuum. It gets a little trickier when you need to work with or live with others. They may well not share your perspective! And in a VUCA world - one where volatility, uncertainty, complexity and ambiguity are prevalent, you may find yourself exhausted attempting to shut it all out. Remember, we learned our Styles as we grew up and we found creative ways to feel safe when we felt threatened. This is a very creative way to find safety - particularly as a child. As an adult, it can get a bit tricky if we've not yet caught on that this is a safety mechanism, and that it's not shared globally, even if it feels totally normal to us! If you are curious, you may want to observe what happens for you as you feel uncertainty. How do you feel? What do you do? How do others around you respond? If you discover that a lot is happening, and it's unclear, you may want to find support to help you see more.
10.
The Special One
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You scored as The Special One You feel most safe with uncertainty when you feel unique and elevated. You rely on feeling acknowledged and special, and when it's not happening, you insist on it. You learned that you are safe when you feel this way... which is great, unless you find yourself in the midst of " real life" - where we're all really quite ordinary. Then it can be quite challenging. And it's important to remember that you learned this. It's not who you are - it's what you learned. Sometimes these things feel so familiar they feel like reality. They are not. Styles are learned, and can be expanded, stretched and unlearned. If you feel like you are trapped in a small space of needing to be more and more special and unique in order to feel ok, you may want to look further.
11.
The Indispensable One
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You scored as The Indispensable One When faced with uncertainty, you look for safety in being essential. If you are needed, you are safe. If not? Uh Oh. You may find yourself feeling compelled to make a valuable contribution, desperate to be recognized for all you contribute. As a child navigating life, this makes sense. Find a way to be valuable and I will be loved. As an adult this gets trickier. Remember, we learn these Styles as ways to feel safe as we grow up. Some Styles stick even as we become adults. They are so familiar to us, we may well not recognize that they are not shared by everyone else. That can get challenging. Not to worry, though. There is a lot we can do to begin to recognize our own Styles and those of our co-workers, friends and family. It's often easier to see other's Styles than our own. And as we get to know our styles, we learn a lot about ourselves. And, sometimes, it's helpful to get some support if it's unclear where to go from here.
12.
The Backpedaler
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Based on your responses, you scored as the Backpedaler When you face uncertainty, you defer to others in order to feel safer. This may show up as avoiding criticism by getting others to like you or what you do, or may show up as over responsibility or taking blame in order to de-escalate criticism or conflict. You have learned to become invisible in order to stay safe. And this invisibility cloak can be very helpful at times. At others, it's a real hindrance. If you are navigating VUCA at work - volatility, uncertainty, complexity and ambiguity, you need all of your capacities online. If you have a good bit of your bandwidth dedicated to being liked or avoiding criticism or conflict, there may not be enough left to navigate well. This can become a vicious spiral. Remember, these Styles, these ways of finding safety are developed in childhood, and feel completely normal and usual to us. We may not even recognize that we're employing strategies in order to feel safe. By getting to know what we do in a gentle and curious way, finding humor in our own strategies as we recognize them, they begin to loosen. If we resist them, they strengthen. It's counter-intuitive, yet true. See if you can identify the different strategies you use to feel safe in different situations. What do you notice? Want to learn more?
13.
Full On Human
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A deep bow to you. You navigate today's complex, volatile and uncertain world with grace, awareness and humility. Your capacity to be with what arises is exemplary, and your commitment to continuously learning and growing is to be honored - it's all that a human can be. That's what I call Full On Human. Humans at our best. Learning, growing, connected, aware and empathetic. You get that it's about more than just me - or us. I'm grateful that you dedicate so much of your life to embodying and growing these capacities and capabilities. You are among a relatively small number of people on this planet who truly can lead us through the challenges we face, on many fronts. Thank you for all the care, dedication, empathy and connection you embody. Please reach out to me! I'd love to meet you.
14.
Pocket Reptile
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Congratulations! You've done your work. You've made friends with your reactivity, and you now operate from what I call Pocket Reptile. Reactions still happen, you still find yourself reacting to those VUCA (volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous) moments and environments, yet, you have developed the capacity to be with them fully, rather than those moments having you. Your capacity to creatively navigate life and work challenges is commendable. Now go out there and create all sorts of new possibilities! And, if you hit one of those inevitable moments where you do get tripped up, remember all that you have developed, and use those moments as fodder to learn and grow more. If you recognize a pattern - something that happens more than once or twice, get support - there is likely something you're not yet seeing. Once you see it fully, that will integrate, too.