Find Out Your Attachment Style.

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Quiz Questions

1.
I easily develop emotional ties to others.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
2.
Having to depend on other people makes me uneasy...
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
3.
I worry that my partner cares less about me than I care about him / her.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
4.
If a partner asks me to establish commitment, I freak out inside.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
5.
If I’m not in a relationship, I am nobody.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
6.
I am constantly trying to fix other people’s problems.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
7.
I let my partner decide everything for me.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
8.
I do whatever my partner wants or tells me to do.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
9.
It’s hard for me to open up and let my walls down.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
10.
I disregard my own needs or wants in order to please others.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
11.
When a relationship starts to become serious, I feel the urge to break it off or run away.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
12.
I cling to my relationships as if my happiness depends on them.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
13.
I would do a lot to keep my partner happy because chances are that I will never find anyone else.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
14.
I constantly check my phone worried that my partner will call and I may miss it...
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
15.
If my partner doesn’t text me back right away, I immediately feel anxious.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
16.
I feel resentful when my partner refuses to help me with something.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
17.
My sense of self-worth depends a lot on my partner’s satisfaction with me.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
18.
I want my partner to need me just as much as I need him/her.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
19.
I am much happier when my partner is completely dependent on me.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
20.
I’m better off not getting close to someone because chances are I will get hurt.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
21.
If my partner were to leave me, I would be devastated.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
22.
I compromise on what I want when I feel that my partner is disapproving.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
23.
I offer people advice even if they don’t ask for it.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
24.
I constantly worry if my partner really loves me.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
25.
I disregard my own core values when they are in conflict with my partner’s demands/behaviors.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
26.
People I date are reluctant to get as close to me as I would like them to.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
27.
I have a hard time completely trusting romantic partners.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
28.
I assume responsibility for my partner’s happiness.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
29.
I tell my partner what to do (i.e. what to wear, what to eat, etc)
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
30.
I seek a lot of reassurance from others before making a decision.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
31.
Everyone else’s opinions matter more than my own.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
32.
The thought that my partner might leave me is constantly on my mind.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
33.
In the past, my partners have described me as “clingy”.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
34.
When a romantic partner wants to be closer to me on an emotional level, I get nervous.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
35.
I completely neglect my own needs and focus fully on the needs of the people I love.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
36.
I have to be whatever my partner desires, otherwise he/she will leave me.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
37.
I fear I would be totally useless without my partner.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
38.
When you're upset, you verbalize how upset you are and outwardly express your feelings.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
39.
When you are upset, you shut down and do something to distract yourself.
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False
40.
If things are going well, you are waiting for "the shoe to drop"...
- A.
  Completely True
- B.
  Mostly True
- C.
  Somewhat True
- D.
  Mostly False
- E.
  Completely False

Quiz Outcomes

1.
The Secure One.
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This is the most healthy attachment style. You have a secure sense of self. The secure attachment style is solidified in early childhood. Children need to feel safe, seen, and soothed. Adults that have a secure attachment style are exactly that, secure, independent, content with themselves and their relationships. Your self-esteem is at a healthy high. You view yourself and your relationships as positive, and you have a healthy way of dealing with attachment issues.
2.
The Anxious One
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You are anxious. Let's go back to childhood to discuss the anxious style. If inconsistency is the norm during early childhood development, anxious attachment style can occur. Children become confused and insecure, not knowing what type of treatment to expect. They often feel suspicious and distrustful of their parent, but can also act clingy and desperate. The anxious tend to worry about their partner's needs above their own. They tend to have a very "selfless" approach to an intimate relationship. There is a constant worry or fear about what your partner is doing, if your partner is "happy". You insist on going "overboard" in a way that you neglect your own needs and focus on your partner's needs. You avoid how you truly feel, and in turn, you can lose yourself within the relationship. Not only are your needs likely unmet, you cannot voice this concern because your focus is on your partner's needs. You are no longer in tune with your own truth. You're often too caring, and you externalize your anxiety, and you can become very overwhelmed easily. You have a sense of eagerness or urgency to get "closer" to the avoidant, while the avoidant tends to maintain a relatively consistent distance.
3.
The Fearful One.
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You are fearful. You may have grown up with disorganized attachments and had some trauma as a child which led you to this type of attachment style. You desire relationships and are comfortable in them until you develop emotional ties. The feelings that were repressed in childhood begin to resurface and are experienced in the present. This can be very stressful for you and your partner. You live in a constant state of worry and fear. You style is high in anxiety and avoidance. At times you struggle with worrying about others' needs, and then you also feel the need to "check out" at times. Your life is not balanced. You do not have a coherent sense of self or a clear connection with others.
4.
Avoidant
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You are the avoidant. You like to keep a safe distance... "The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference." The avoidant one projects a lot of indifference. You may not be the "commitment type" because committing to anything leaves a lot of room for vulnerability. You fear that loving someone leads to losing them, and that is a painful idea or endeavor. You struggle with intimacy. Often this is due to the feeling of "not being good enough". Unconsciously you may use "distancing strategies" to keep a safe distance from your partner. You shut down if you get upset. You like to seclude yourself or "tune out" your partner. Let's talk about why this may happen... As a child, your parent may not have been emotionally available. You may have cried as a child and were discouraged about crying. You may have been encouraged to be independent or grow up too quickly.

Find Out Your Attachment Style.

Decode your relationship attachment patterns by taking our Attachment Style Quiz to find out if your attachment style is Secure, Anxious, Fearful, or Avoidant. Once you have completed the quiz, you will have a better understanding of yourself and your relationship patterns.

Quiz Questions

Quiz Outcomes